Bathroom Attendant

Like I’ve said before on my introductory article four months ago, I consider myself vocal and frequently express clearly my opinion about things even though you didn’t request it. So today I felt like talking about my last encounter with a bathroom attendant.
I don't like that awkward ‘do-I-tip-and-how-much’ moment when I go to a bathroom that has an attendant. But the reality is, for us women, having a bathroom attendant at a club/lounge is somewhat convenient: you can put on perfume, shave your legs, and buy a pair of new earrings or just simply gum… for a price. But here’s what happened last time I encountered a bathroom attendant at a club. I don’t know why but the very second I entered the women’s bathroom at a local lounge, I had my suspicions that it was going to be irritating (and no I am not referring to the hives I got this morning).

"Hello young lady! How are you doing?" - the bathroom attendant said as I made my way to the closest and cleanest stall.

“Hey! "What's up?" - I said friendly but unenthusiastically, hoping she would get the point that I am in a rush to go to the bathroom and not interested in a conversation.

"How are the men out there? Have you met any new gentlemen? Or do you have a date tonight? - She said probably in the hopes that she would earn a nice little tip.

“Uh, yeah I do have a date tonight” – Yyyeah, I lied thinking that she would just leave me alone.

And of course, she didn’t. She continued with the questions and comments while I was finishing as fast as possible to go back to the floor. She gave me soap and opened the faucet for me, so I felt obligated to leave her a dollar. Now, was this a bad experience? Eh, not really, but I do like to have my privacy and concentration when I’m using the facilities.

So to all bathroom attendants, here are some points you might want to consider:

1. Please do not give me an elaborate welcome when I enter the bathroom. Just a “Good Evening” or “What’s Up?” will be enough.

2. Get rid of that bottle of 80’s Poison or White Diamonds perfume. Ok, just in case you didn’t know, its two-thousand f*ing seven!

3. Don't dispense the liquid soap into my hands. I can do it myself. Let us women handle our own soap. If you want, just have the paper towels ready for us to dry our hands off with.

4. See # 2: I mean… Seriously.

5. If I leave more than a dollar in your basket, please remember who I am. I know you see a lot of people entering the bathroom in one night, but here’s one good reasons why I give you a good tip: I'm going to be running to the bathroom every 20 minutes or so and don't want to give any more tips. So next time I give you a five dollar bill, take a good look at me, whether is my face, my little black dress, my rocker haircut… you got the point.